His name is Chad. He’s a lanky black cat with bright green eyes and he came into my parents’ lives about three years ago. My parents have a farm in Boerne, Texas, and after my mom got her chickens, well, it seemed natural enough that a farm cat should complete the scene.
It was a long process.
Rather than getting a domesticated cat, my parents chose to adopt two feral cats, Chad and Copernicus. When the ferals arrived at the farm, they had to acclimatize to the place and get used to making it their home. So they stayed inside a cage inside the barn for a week. Then they were allowed out of the cage for a week. Then they were allowed out of the barn. My dad sighed, “We’ll see, maybe they’ll stick around.” Copernicus ran off (making his home at a neighbouring farm, we later found out).
Chad stayed.
At first he wouldn’t let anyone near him; he ran off and observed my parents from a distance. For about six months, the only way they knew he was around was that his food would disappear. But my Dad fed him every morning and night and the food kept disappearing.
“Sometimes, when I would go to the barn he would be under the tractor or someplace, but every time I would approach he would take off. Then I started walking as close as I could without him leaving and put down little treats on the ground and walk away back to whatever I was doing. “
Dad made Chad a special cat entrance to the garage and a special cat house to live in. And over time, Chad started coming a little closer.
After two years of consistent, dedicated, unconditional care taking, Chad felt safe enough to walk up to my Dad in the back yard and let him touch him. He let himself be pet. And he started to purr.
Nowadays, my Dad can’t go anywhere without Chad coming over and rubbing up against him, or head butting him for a scratch. (“That darned cat won’t leave me alone!” Dad says exasperatedly, but secretly happy.) Chad’s become a big ol’ cat softie. At first, Chad got so excited about being pet that he would nip everyone’s hands a little (who doesn’t get a little scrappy when they’re testing a relationship out?), but now he’s relaxed enough to accept affection without much cat drama.
Here’s what I’ve learned from Chad:
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Deep down, everyone wants love.
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It’s only when we’ve been hurt and alone for awhile that we’re scared of connection.
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Trust takes time and consistency. Sometimes two years of being there every day.
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Being fed is nice. But being pet is important, too.
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When love feels new to us, we may get scared and scratchy, but underneath the biting, we really want it.
I’ve been watching over the farm and making friends with Chad. He’s still a bit wary of me, but last night he came on over and head butted me for awhile so that I got to pet him.
As I scratched his ears, I whispered down to him, “Chad, look at you! You found your family now.”
Chad the cat.
