Twelve tips for self-care during times of transition.
The uncertainty that is involved in a big life change – death, divorce, moving, illness, job loss, marriage, kids, to name a few – doesn’t get settled all at once. And stress, though it may feel like it’s all in your head, can have profound effects on your physical well-being, affecting your sleep, your immune system, digestion, anxiety, and levels of inflammation.
However, there are many small, practical steps that you can take that can make a profound difference in your stress and sense of well-being. Here are twelve of my favorites tools to manage stress, build your resilience, and practice self-care when life gets shaky.
1. Find a yoga studio.
Finding a local yoga studio can be an anchor that can help you feel more connected to people, get you grounded in your body, and create a place to go for self-care and stress reduction. While the at-home apps are helpful, I recommend going to a studio if possible so that you can connect to other people.
2. Find a coffee shop.
This is a pillar for me, at least, because I love love love coffee! For you, it may be a local bar, tea shop, or knitting room. Find your favorite watering hole, and start to make friends with some of the folks there. Before long, you’ll be a regular.
3. Connect with loved ones.
Now is not the time to be a reclusive turtle. Reach out to your friends and loved ones and stay connected to people that support you.
4. Express yourself.
I write in my journal. You may paint, sing, create poetry, or do pottery. Find a creative outlet for your feelings. Don’t worry about the result. While your art might turn into something interesting, the goal of being creative in this context is to help you express and clear out your emotional and mental experience.
5. Exercise. And have a dance party.
Getting in your body gets you out of your head, and remind you that you are present and safe moment to moment. Whether you use yoga, weights, jogging, or biking, do something every day to get physical. In addition to getting you into the present moment, exercise can help you feel strong, resourceful, and capable. And have a daily dance party. It doesn’t matter how you look. Having a private dance party to your favorite music is an immediate mood booster.
6. Sleep.
When you’re stressed, your immune system is compromised. Sleep is the great rest and repair time for your body and mind. If you’re having trouble sleeping, look into some of the strategies that you can use to support good sleep hygiene.
7. Eat Good Stuff.
Treat yourself like a prince or princess. Eat nourishing, wholesome food that supports your self-care. Both the food – and the care that you are showing yourself – help you to feel valued and grounded.
8. Don’t Be A Hero.
This is not necessarily the time to quit smoking, go off of caffeine, or commit to a big work project. When possible, make self-care your priority. Acknowledge that transitions can be challenging, and give yourself permission to rest, process, and feel.
9. Use TMC’s, but with discretion.
A temporary mood changer (TMC) is a substance or activity (alcohol, Netflix, chocolate, or flirting on dating apps) that provides a quick pick me up…but may come with a physical or emotional hangover. Oh, I’ve been there! While these treats may provide temporary relief, they may leave us feeling worse and can ultimately undermine our health and stability. Use your TMC’s with awareness and discretion.
10. Breathe.
There’s nothing like five good, deep breaths to help you reset your nervous system, get embodied, and give you a reset. Enjoy anytime, anywhere.
11. Meditate.
Don’t have a meditation practice? No problem. Start with two minutes of conscious breathing as a daily practice and voila! You are now a meditator. Meditating is a way to put a wedge in our daily habits and create a little space where you can experience the “you” that is there beneath all the thoughts, feelings, and life fluctuations. Consider it a touchstone. And don’t be surprised if your mind is full of stuff; the point is to watch. If you need help getting started, check out an app like 10% Happier as a resource. I’ve also got a bunch of 5-minute meditations on this site you can try.
12. Drink Water.
Water is the ultimate rinse. When we are in transition, we are digesting and processing our experiences – physically and emotionally. Support your body’s elimination functions by staying well-hydrated.
Bonus: Remember your why
A transition is an opportunity to reconnect with our values. When everything is in the air, we can be mindful about how we want to place the pieces that come back down. Volitional transitions (divorce, separation, moving) become opportunities to reassert our own highest values, and remember our highest “why.”
And finally, a transition can be a spiritual opportunity to reconnect with our internal resources. We can view the transition as a reminder that we are not everything that we think or feel. We are not our jobs, our roles, or our possessions. In the midst of transition, we can find unexpected space to breathe, feel, and be.
